My stepfather has been my mother's caregiver for the past 10 years.  She has COPD, Emphezema, arthritis and is on oxygen full time.  Two months ago my stepdad passed away very suddenly.  We were left with a difficult decision of what to do with our Mom.  We decided it was our duty as daughters to take care of her now since she took care of us as babies.  The problem is she is very controlling and can't let a minute go by without telling you what or how to do something.  She never says thank you and now she is complaining about the extra PG&E, water, etc. she is paying for us being there helping her.  I tried to explain to her that it would probably cost her about $3,000 to $4,000 a month to have someone come in a take care of her, but she just doesn't get it.  I'm at the end of my rope, nothing nice comes out of her mouth and we are constantly fighting.  She will make it a point to walk down the hall and tell us to close the blinds, when she is capable of doing it herself.  I feel she is really taking advantage of us, we cook, clean, shop and take her to all her appointments.  Please does anyone have any advise, I'm about to lose my mind.